LAST words from me..:)

kini aku sendiri..
berjalan di dunia ini bersendirian..
dibuang jauh...
keluarga..?
ada tetapi aku paham mereka terpaksa mengutamakan yang lain..
tiada kecil hati cuma sedih..
ditambah dgn pemergian insan paling aku syg pertengahan tahun lalu...
Almarhumah ibunda..(al-fatihah)
di awal tahun pula insan yang juga paling aku syg juga pergi meninggalkan aku..
tetap bukn perpisahan mati sekada perpisahan hidup..
aku paham bukan aku tidak mahu menurut..
tp aku sdh membuat satu rancangan yang mungkin mengejut..
cuma sebelum itu aku ingin menyelesaikan semua masalah yg berrkait dengan aku skrg...
insy'Allah dengan pertolongan Allah s.w.t semuanya akan selesai..
jika selesai x kira lambat atau cepat..
aku telah memohon di suatu tempat agar permohonan aku diluluskan..
x kira betapa ssh urusan nya aku akan tetap pergi...
bukan membawa hati , hanya ingin masa yg ada berjuang di jalanNya..
pilihan yang utama adalah Gaza..
jika kita bersedih atau gembira , segala yang paling rapat adalah Allah s.w.t..
jadi mudah2an hajat ku ini kali tercapai..
ini mungkin adalah entri terakhir saya..
insy'Allah juga kalau di izinkan saya akan meneruskannya kembali...
kepada insan2 yang tersayang :

ayah : semoga ayah akan sihat selalu... dan dianugerahi keberkatan hidup di dunia dan di akhirat..
big bro : aku berdoa semoga kau akan berubah..:)
soulheart :  ini lah caranya aku akan menanti dirimu smp bila2... aku hanya bertemankan pencipta ku... kadang2 kita tidak dapat menghalang sumpah kita dari teringkar.. kita hanya manusia yang melakukan kesilapan.. dan bertaubat lah jika kita ingkar.. sesungguhnya Allah itu maha pengampun... insy'Allah jikalau betul kita ditakdirkan antara satu sama lain.. kita akan bersama...:) jagalah harta dan maruah kita sebaiknya demi Allah s.w.t..:) assalamualaikum...

remember

i'm still ur superman..:)

just smile dear..

blind confusing..

is it real ?

is it i'm lost in time..

i'm not over u..?

is there any me in yours..

or it just memories that u doesn't need anymore..

or maybe i just over think about it..

maybe i look so weak in my position now.

but i really can take it.. 

as long as i'm still breathing...

dont worry dear.. maybe someday i'm just your ordinary past in your future...

i knew it..

i have forgive u a long time ago..

but even its easy for to forgive u but its hard for me to forget u..

its harder than you know to not loving u..

i'll try to get strong...

i'll try my best to win my life..

i dont want to let down by my life that sucks..

i miss u all the time dear..

i miss ur hugs..

my lips is just for u until i meet my Creator..

even we can't see each other anymore..

i smell every inch of yours everyday,

i see your smile in my dream..

i see everything about u every single fucking second in my life..

i have lost.. but the losing of me of is the winning of yours..

so smile dear..

i'm still your superman..:) ;0

and u still superman soulheart 

Pain in words ! :)

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 going through i this line of shit is make me sick ! fxck !!! i was never imagine this situation will came out !!
 even sometimes we must face the reality not stay in illusion..  seriously i love u so much ! love that i mean is Cinta not sayang !! but i couldn't let my eyes see u sad and cry again because of my life that sucks !!! i'm so sorry... after this let Allah decided where the line will we go... together or not... let's Allah decided... amin...

i'm so sorry..:'(

i'm so sorry for what i am...:( i love u so much... i miss u damn much..

♥ untuk kasih ♥

mysoulheart,

aku tak pernah terfikir yang kau akan tinggalkan aku begini,
aku tak pernah terfikir yang semua akan jadi begini..
setahun ibarat sehari kau mengenali aku..
dikala amarah mu memuncak..
aku diam dan membisu..
dikala amarh ku memuncak..
kau balas dgn amarah...
aku cuma ingin tempat bersandar..
dikala aku tiada tempat bergantung...
semenjak ketiadaan ibuku..
kaulah segalanya..
tempat mengadu..
perih,
penat,
sakit,
tiada apa yang ingin dapat ku ungkap..
mulut ku terpaku...
terikat..
aku hanya ingin hidup seperti orang lain..
mungkin kenangan bersamamu jadi pengganti dirimu kelak..
mungkin dirimu akan pudar mencintaiku..
tapi bagi aku ia tiada berkesudahan..
mencintaimu adalah pengalaman indah bagiku..
bagimu senang mencari pengganti..
aku juga senang mencari pengganti..
tapi penggantinya adalah kenangan kita berdua..
kusimpan semua kenangan jauh dilubuk hati..
aku mencintai mu lebih dari segalanya...
ryna arynah..
wanita yang akan sentiasa bertakhta dihati..
semoga kau berjaya dalam hidupmu..
salah dan silap ku pohon..
tiada pernah kuingin sakiti mu..
tapi terlalu banyak titik hitam dalam hidupku..
tiada malu,
tiada segan,
tiada iri,
tiada dendam..
hanya cinta yang mendalam bagimu..
semoga cintamu bersama diriku..
sehingga ku berdepan dengan Penciptaku..

p/s : aku akan sentiasa menyayangi dan mencintaimu walaupun satu hari nanti kau tiada lagi cinta untukku..

kasih tiada lafaz

kata tinggal kata..
ungkapan hanya lah bayangan..
tiada yang menandingi perasaan..
pudar mengikut waktu ingin melupakan...

seindah kasih tiada terperi..
diunjur sayang tiada henti..
semai kasih tiada berbuah..
meninggal pergi tanpa kasih..

ungkapan ditinggal tiada teringat lagi..
menilai duniawi menyisih kasih..
bukti kasih tiada diberi..
masalah diungkit jadi penyeri..

diri ditinggal dikala hujan..
ribut datang melanda diri..
seorang diri melawan ribut..
tiada terdaya melawan pusarnya..

tergantung hidup bernyawa tidak..
hanya doa ku panjat ke atas Illahi..
sentiasa damai kasih yang pergi..
ku pekik dia tertawa..

andai cinta jadi lafaz..
ku beri hati sepenuh kasih..
tiada ku cari ganti lagi..
hanya kasih bertakhta di hati..

cinta ku hnya untukmu..
tiada ribut dapat menghalang..
tapi kini diri sendiri..
memori tinggal jadi pengganti..

salam kasih yang tiada penamat..